My Brain is Mush


Stinging eyes… Stiff muscles… A brain that feels like it has melted like a popsicle… Such is the life of an author who is writing a second draft and simultaneously editing their work. I have literally been on my laptop all weekend. And yet, I still can’t bring myself to stop.

I’m into the sixth chapter of the second draft now, and so far the whole thing is up to 23K words. If my estimate is correct, this book will have about 15 chapters. I don’t think that’s unreasonable, so I feel like I’m on the right track, at least, which is comforting. However, I’m starting to wish this darn book was just done already. Some of you were probably laughing when I got done with the rough draft and said, “I’ve got my life back now!” HA! Yeah… so not happening. This is when the real work begins.

I’m starting to second-guess myself again… “Is this really any good?” “Am I just wasting my time?” “Is this book really going to appeal to anyone but me?” I wish I could just turn off all that negative self-talk. I’m learning to ignore it, which is good, but it still depresses me sometimes. I’ve committed now to writing, wholly and completely. I’m even going to be studying it in college. Why do I still doubt myself constantly? There’s nothing else in the world I want to do. End of story. I have to be good at this.

I can’t think anymore… I think my brain is about to cut me off. I’ve overworked it, and now it’s going on strike. This novel is going to be the death of me…

Thanks for putting up with my pity parties, readers. You all deserve medals 🙂 Stay tuned for some big reveals! I’m hoping my second draft will be done by the end of the month, and then I can move on to the final draft and the editing process. Once I feel like it’s safe to do so, I’ll share a short little teaser here on this blog. Also, there’s still the anxiously-awaited cover that is going to be positively epic! Still can’t believe this is really happening!

Have a great Sunday night,

Riv

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