What Defines You? (My Confession)

This has been the biggest question on my mind lately. Am I defined by…


My name?

My religion?

My race?

My gender?

Who does/does not love me?

My career?

How far I get in life?

All of the above…. or none of the above?


Let’s be honest, we all define ourselves by something outside ourselves. It may be another person, material possessions, a job, a belief, or even a persona. Why? Why are we not enough for ourselves?

Lately I am finding, though, that there is only one constant in my life, one person I could NEVER, EVER be without, and that is me. That begs the question, do I love me? Do I treat myself the way I would treat someone else that I loved?

Sometimes I think we humans have problems because we genuinely hate ourselves. We can’t forgive ourselves for the things we do wrong. We despise characteristics of ourselves that we shouldn’t despise. We criticize ourselves for the smallest mistakes. Is it any wonder that we start treating other people the same way?

How much different would the world be if everybody loved themselves and thought the best of themselves? Life is what you think it is. If you think positive, you will reap positive rewards. So why do we sow seeds of bitterness and hatred directed at our own selves, let alone others who are doing the same thing to themselves?

What defines you? You do. There is no one else on this planet that can legitimately control what you think of yourself. Influence? Yes. But they can never control you.

Now for my confession: I’m sick of being lazy because I don’t believe in myself. I haven’t been writing because I don’t think I’m good enough. All I can see is my flaws and not the enormous potential I was created with. That is over. If I don’t post on this blog every week from now on, please, someone come kick me in the butt. Sitting on my couch feeling sorry for myself is never going to win me any awards or publish any books.

Thank you to anyone who reads this. I hope I have inspired you like you inspire me.

~Alli Day



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