Thoughts on Black Friday


Originally posted on Life Behind the Kid:

A lot of my readers live in the U.S. and celebrate Christmas but I’m hoping this post will ring true with everyone, because I’m about to talk about something that everyone can relate to: TOYS. Everybody loves toys. Even as you become an adult, you have to admit that our devices, cars, household gadgets and other items can become a lot like toys are to a child. But my question today is this, “How important are they, really?”

To a mom, I would say that toys are definitely a lifesaver. When you need 10 minutes of peace to clean or organize or heck, veg out on the couch, what do you say? “Here, play with your toys.” Honestly I think they benefit us sometimes more than they do our kids. But here’s a picture that illustrates that all these expensive doodads and thingamajigs are not always necessary.

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This is my…

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Official Resignation


I hereby declare that NaNoWriMo is a wonderful thing, but simply not for me.

I have tried and tried to get an idea ready to write and the bottom line is, I just cannot write something if the idea is only half-developed and sloppy. I JUST CAN’T. I aim for something amazing when I write and when it’s not amazing, to me it just… sucks. I can’t handle writing something awful. It’s just not in me. Great job to those who have already written 30K+ words in a month though, I truly admire you for that! I wish I could have joined you in that triumph! I won’t be attempting this again… It’s just not my style or my method to rush through things. For me, slow and steady wins the race, or at least tries to.

So yeah, now that that weight is off my shoulders I can tell you what my dilemma is. I am torn between two AMAZING book ideas. It’s the worst love triangle ever. On the one hand, I have a fantasy novel that I’ve been working on the concept for forever and now I’m finally figuring out what I need to do with it. On the other, I have a new(ish) idea for a YA fiction novel involving a girl and a band that is pretty awesome too. I would love to write both but it is too confusing for me to work on two projects at once. I need to choose one to focus on, but gosh, it’s just so hard!

Why do I have to be so much of a perfectionist? It really is a curse as a writer. I’m missing out on writing an amazing book because I’m just too afraid to frickin’ FAIL. Why is failure so scary to me?? Somebody give me a pep talk, please… And if you have any suggestions for deciding what idea to follow through on that would be great. I know it’s hard without the details and I’m sorry for that, but even just a general suggestion on how to make up my mind would be grand.

Thanks for reading my incoherent babbling. I’ve had a long day.

~A.D.

Frigid Fall Fun Day (with Floaters)


Alli Day:

Crazy kid…

Originally posted on Life Behind the Kid:

So today was kind of a typical day for Austin and me up until about noon. A few minutes after I got up, he started stirring and whimpered a little bit to let me know he was awake. I picked him up and held him as I did a few things on the computer and after Daddy went to work I fed him his cereal and then we went to the living room to watch Gilmore Girls. Yes, we watch shows that Mommy likes during the day. He doesn’t care yet, anyway.

My mom picked us up later and we had a fun Chick-fil-A lunch with her and my brother and sister. It was so cold today that I almost decided not to go out, but I love hanging out with people outside the house and so does he, so we braved the Arctic Tundra with jackets and blankets and…

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Welcome to my Parenting Journal!


Alli Day:

My new (additional) blog, “Life Behind the Kid”

Originally posted on Life Behind the Kid:

Hello readers!

I decided to jump off of my writing blog, http://lifebehindthepages.wordpress.com/, and create a blog specifically dedicated to parenting and being a stay-at-home-mom. The title is not only a play on my other blog title but also a play on the fact that everyone greets the baby first. Everybody. He’s the star, and everyone knows it!

This blog will only contain advice if I decide something I did that worked is worth sharing. I will also share deals that I find on baby/children’s items from time to time. Mostly, though, this is just a place for people who know us or read my writing blog to catch up on what Austin is doing, saying, learning, and getting into. (it’s also a place for me to visit when my baby is grown up and out of the house and I’m laying in bed with three boxes of tissues bawling…

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Missing Motivation


I have to say I have never struggled this much to start a novel. Ever. I’m doing NaNoWriMo this year (or trying anyway) and I still can’t work up the courage to really commit to my novel idea. I haven’t written much in it so far as a result. At this point, I’m wondering if maybe I should just chuck the whole thing and start again (for like the 15th time…).

I know I could be a great writer if all of my ideas didn’t suck so much. I’ve got the expressiveness, grammar, form, and everything else down, but all of my ideas are just… duds. Plus, even if I do get a good idea, I don’t believe in it enough to write all the hard stuff (descriptions, explanations, etc.) and so my work ends up being short-winded and completely empty and hollow. All of this uncertainty is leading me to doubt so much about myself. If I don’t believe in what I’m writing, am I even a writer at all?

I know, I’m wasting valuable time talking about how hard it is to get started instead of actually starting. I guess I just hate spending time and effort on a thing if I don’t believe in it. I did some research on my personality type the other day and found out that I’m an “INFJ”: Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling, Judging. People like me have to have a real passion for something in order to pursue it. We have to believe in things. Also, we’re perfectionists, which makes it so hard to write and not care whether it’s good or bad. Maybe that’s why it’s so hard for me to actually write something. Maybe that’s why it feels near impossible.

I’m starting to think that maybe NaNoWriMo isn’t going to work for me this time. I’m just not ready to sit down and write. Perhaps my personality just will not allow me to proceed until the outline is finalized. My concept is not mature yet and I need it to be.

This is not me throwing in the towel… yet. I’ll try to do some outlining tonight and see where it leads me. I won’t cheat and add it into my word count but maybe it will at least allow me to stay in the running.

Maybe, maybe, maybe… Ugh. I hate being this unsure about everything.

Hope your day or evening is going better than mine!

~A.D.

Happy Halloween!


This is just a quick post for the sole purpose of showing off my adorable son. Seriously, Minion Dave has never been cuter–

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We had an extremely fun night at a small house party and I only had two pieces of candy tonight. (A vast improvement compared to last year, when that number was more like 20… but hey, I was pregnant and craving chocolate)

We don’t really celebrate Halloween in the sense that we don’t go all out and decorate our house with witches and ghosts, but who could pass up the opportunity to dress up your 6-month-old like one of your favorite TV characters? Not me!

Hope that smiling face brightened up your day/evening like it brightens up every single one of my days :)

~A.D.

P.S. If you follow this blog, THANK YOU for helping me reach 100+ WordPress followers this past week!!!

I Guess I’m a Feminist


I have not always been a supporter of “equal rights,” not because I didn’t want equal rights for all people, but just because I had no idea how important they really were. Once I got out into the real world as an adult, I realized that many people still don’t see women and men as being on an even playing field. Women are traded, sold, objectified, forced into marriages, roofied and raped, belittled in the workplace and abused… On and on the list goes and if you think about how women are treated for too long, it can really make you hate the male gender.

On the flip side, being married has taught me that men deserve equality, too. Not all men are rapists and abusers and every human being on the planet has feelings and rights. If men were “allowed” to express their feelings openly as much as women are, they might not harbor so much anger and resentment against women. My husband and I have faced shifting balances of power in our marriage but our goal is always the same: equality and freedom of expression. I want him to express himself and feel valued and I want the same for myself. It’s not always easy, but the alternative (one person dominating the relationship) is simply unacceptable.

I look at the world the way I look at my marriage. Women and men should coexist in harmony and everyone should have the right to the life they want to live. If a mother wants to work outside the home and make the same wage as her male counterparts, it shouldn’t even be an issue, it should be a given. If a father wants to be a stay-at-home daddy and support his wife’s career from the home front, I think that’s awesome and should be encouraged and accepted. Alternatively, mothers should be encouraged to stay home with the house and kids without guilt if that is their calling and purpose in life. Just because you’re a stay-at-home mom doesn’t mean you can’t still support the equality and freedom of women everywhere. (of course equal rights aren’t just for moms and dads, but that’s the example I’m the most familiar with right now)

The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines feminism as:

“the belief that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities; organized activity in support of women’s rights and interests; the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes”

I always thought that feminism was more complicated than that, or that it meant exalting women above men and trying to make us the “dominant sex,” but it seems to be more about equality and freedom for all. I really wish we had a different word for this idea since it’s not just about “female equality” anymore. I guess “gender equality” is the best term for the idea but “gender egalitarian” is just too much of a mouthful. So until they come up with a better label, I guess I’m a feminist.

Happy Wednesday readers!

A.D.

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